Not Everyone is Meant to Stay in Your Life Forever

And most people won’t.

That’s life.

People come and go.

Activities that you once called your favorite will one day be nothing more than a memory.

Friends that you’ve trusted with your life can disappear without a trace or leave without saying goodbye. And there’s not always someone to blame in these situations. Sometimes people just grow apart.

Hobbies, priorities, and goals change as people pursue what matters most to them. And there’s nothing wrong with that. It sounds a little sad and lonely. Like you’re on a perpetual merry-go-round of friends and social circles. Never staying in one place or state of mind long enough to develop the bonds you’re so desperate to have.

Time Lost

I’ve spent thousands and thousands of hours building up skills that I no longer have use for. I’ve played tens of thousands of hours of video games. That number might sound outrageous and that’s because it is. Let alone spending it on something that I can’t really reap the benefits of. These days I don’t like games nearly as much, but more importantly, they’re no longer aligned with my goals and dreams.

I also spent thousands of hours hanging out with people who could appreciate where I was coming from. Night after night of gaming, hanging out, and chatting. I built some great friendships and spent time with amazing people – many of whom I haven’t talked to in years. We learned together. They taught me things about myself. And hopefully, I was able to do the same. I can never go back, nor do I want to, but I treasure these memories.

There was a time in my life where I wanted to be a professional gamer. But somewhere along the line, that dream died. I don’t regret playing or the time I spent having fun and building towards my goals. What I regret is the time that I spent after giving up my dream. I gave up on wanting to make something out of it but continued playing anyway. This was a waste of time and didn’t serve me well.

Another skill that I developed that has a similar place on the shelf these days is poker. I’ve spent many thousands of hours playing, learning, and thinking poker. And although I still play sometimes, it’s not the same. I used to be so passionate about it. So obsessed and driven towards becoming better. Now, I play when I feel like it. 

I still like it, I just don’t love it anymore.

Time Found

Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because it happened.”
-Dr. Seuss

At the end of the day, life is a single-player game. You’re born alone and you’ll die alone. The world was just fine before you got here and it will be just fine long after your departure. 

You’ll do things and meet people that you think will be apart of your life forever. The reality of it is, most people won’t be. Accept this for what it is. Life is a series of sensations and experiences. Be present and choose to live in the moment.

Life will ebb and flow. Things don’t always make sense going forward, but looking back, you can always connect the dots. Lean into change. Not everyone or everything is meant to stay in your life forever.

And that’s okay.

Accept it for what it is. Appreciate the time that you share with people because there will come a day when you no longer have the option. Acknowledge the role that you play in your life and the lives of others.

This is a reminder to forgive the little things and to appreciate the time spent with friends and family.

You never know how much more you have.

You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something – your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.”

-Steve Jobs

21 comments

  1. Love your perspective here! Everything seems a lot more clear in hindsight, and itโ€™s our job to take this knowledge to grow/better ourselves. Iโ€™m glad you look back fondly on your gaming/poker memories despite the fact that they didnโ€™t necessarily further your goals. Keep sharing your insights man, theyโ€™re always an incredible read!

    1. Hey Cole!

      It’s so nice to hear from you! I hope you’re doing well. That was all apart of my journey. It’s part of what made me the person I am today and I wouldn’t have had it any other way. And I appreciate the support and kind words – Thank you! ๐Ÿ˜€

  2. Pretty awesome:) Loved this post. I was reading this article today morning with a cup of coffee. I felt too good reading it on the early morning for a new beginning today ๐Ÿ™‚

    1. Thank you, Manasa! ๐Ÿ™‚

      Every day is a new beginning. A chance to reinvent yourself and to live your best life. I hope you had a great day!

  3. Such a true and saddening statement. No one said adulting meant losing people on a regular basis, and as you stated, without something or someone to blame aside from just life’s path. Great read!

  4. You make some very valid points, but I feel the thing that really stuck me was “Be present and live in the moment” we are all suffering in one way or another, as everyone has lifes problems that’s just a fact, but the truth of the matter is, what you choose to do with that suffering or problem, which can determine your lifes outcomes and do you chose to accept and move forward.

    1. Hi Harpreet. I completely agree. I think that one of the most important things in life is to be intentional with how you interpret things. As you said, we have a choice. We can focus on a problem or we can focus on a solution. It’s all perspective ๐Ÿ™‚

  5. So true! I remember wanting to be a singer and i took lessons in classical music but as time went by, i grew out of it. I don’t regret it, infact i love singing even today but it’s just not the same anymore and i’m okay with it.

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